30 Day Photography Challenge: Day 30 | Self-Portrait

What a month.
My camera feels the love.  That's for sure!

I got myself human looking today, all ready to attempt that "self-portrait" once again.  My hair was fighting me, my makeup hated me, and my clothes... Okay, I am whining.  The point is: I was far from excited to be taking a photo of myself.

I think doing self-portraiture is a very, very good thing for a photographer to do.
It reminds you just how self-conscience and nervous a client can be!

As soon as I got my tripod set up and my camera set, my boys decided they wanted to get in on this photo taking action.  At first they were content with pretending they were taking each shot.  (I even set up a second tripod with a toy camera on it, so they could both be the photographer.  Aw...)

Then they couldn't resist and jumped in for some shots with mommy.

They have been my models off and on all month.  How great it is to wrap this challenge up with them as well?

This is my self-portrait.
I am an author.
A blogger.
A photographer.
An avid reader.
A dreamer.  A goofball.  A friend, a wife, a sister, a daughter.

But at the end of every day.  At the start of every morning.  What I do day in and day out.  What I love, could never live without, what I am... I am mommy.  And I love my self-portrait.

30 Day Photography Challenge: Day 21 | Faceless Self-Portrait

I had a few ideas for today's challenge.  I even made a prop for one of the ideas, something that would have been entertaining and very tongue and cheek.  I took a few shots with that prop, but for some reason the photos just didn't feel like "it."  Then I tried something different... and the shot was there.

I love this one.
Yes, it isn't full focused.  It is grainy.  There are imperfections.

It is me.

I battle depression.  Sometimes it gets the best of me and I can barely find my way out.  Sometimes I don't want to find the way out.  I feel raw, hidden away, faceless.  This photo I decided to go with today... it is the faceless me in more than one way.

There are three main things that manage to pull me out of my facelessness.  My husband and sons.  My writing.  And my photography.  They define who I am.  They fill the emptiness and remind me that I have these blessings in my life.  They remind me that I am someone.  Someone worth something.

I know I am not the only one out there who ever feels faceless.
Remember: You are someone.  You have a face, a beautiful face.  And the shadows always pass.

30 Day Photography Challenge: Day 13 | Yourself With 13 Things

Today's challenge was easy.  And hard.

Easy because I knew exactly what my 13 things would be.  I love books.  I eat, sleep, and breathe books.  Heck, I even write books!  My bedroom is literally filled to the brim with books.  I knew I wanted photos with some of my favorite reads.  My only disappointment was it was supposed to be 13 things... not hundreds of things.

I love books.

As for the hard part...
Hard because it is self-photography.  I love taking photos of other people.  But once I am placed in front of the camera, I become a huge self-conscience blob.  More often than not I will act goofy and crazy, just because it all boils down to how I hate how I look.  Yes, I do.

I am a woman.

Along with that, it is all aim and guess.  I can't get down in the grass or climb the tree to get the shot I want.

Still, I had to complete this challenge.  While my youngest slept, my oldest and I went out to the tiny back stretch of grass our apartment has. (There isn't even a playground here.  Sad right?) I threw out a blanket, set up my books, and hoped for the best.  The grass was still soggy from yesterday's freak downpour, my shoes became muddy, and the lighting was what you expect for 2pm.

Still, I feel happy with my final product.

Of course, if you ask my son, he took the photos.  He was very excited to help and stood behind the camera, watching as the self-timer clicked down then snapped photos of his mommy.  I even got told I am pretty.  (He is learning young how to compliment a woman.)

My dream someday is to have my own personal library in my home.  Floor to ceiling bookshelves, jam-packed with amazing reads.  I will most likely never leave that room.  And I will be in heaven.

Here are a few more photos of me with my obsession:

My son wanted to be in the photos too, pajamas and all.
How could I say no to the world's best assistant and fellow book fanatic?

30 Day Photography Challenge: Day 8 | A Bad Habit

Now honestly, why on Earth would you want to photograph a bad habit?  Just thinking about what bad habit I wanted to show the internet world got me nervous.  We all like to pretend we are perfect, that nothing bothers us and we have everything under control.

Who wants to know that my laundry is never done?  Or that I eat more chocolate than a trick or treating champion?

Sticking to my guns about never taking the easy way out with this challenge, I decided to photograph my true bad habit.  This is a hard thing to share.  I tend to hide my fingers.  I do not like what my habit does to them, and never let them show.  Especially in photographs.

I have the bad habit of cuticle picking.  When I get nervous, upset, anxious... it gets worse.  My poor fingers get the brunt of my sub-conscience worries.  I have tried many times to let them be.  And sometimes it works.  Then life gets a hold of me and boom... there goes the picking once again.

After taking these photos and being forced to look at my fingers as I edited, I realized how much I want this bad habit to stop.  It is far from photo worthy.  It hurts.  And it is just plain annoying.  I didn't learn much photography-wise with this challenge (used my 50mm arms length away with a nice wide f-stop to get a pretty blur...)  But I did, for a fact, learn that this is a bad habit I need to put an end to.

The proof is in the photo.

30 Day Photography Challenge: Day 1 | Self-Portrait

I have taken many, many self-portraits over the years.  It is always the standard routine:

• Hold camera arms length away
• Flash cheesy grin
• Click.  Chimp.  And repeat.

(If you don't know what "chimp" means, it is the act of constantly checking out what you just took on the little screen before clicking again.  Oo oo ahh ahh.)

For the first challenge of my 30 Day Challenge, I wanted to start with something new.

What's that mean?
It means none of the above will be allowed to happen.  I wanted to use my 50mm lens.  Which means arms length away would be a nice detailed shot... of my nose.  Something no one out there would want to see.  Trust me on that.

So, out came the tripod.

Then came the focusing issue.
How can I focus for an at least semi-good shot?

This is where my pillow came in play.  I set it up approximately where I would be sitting, focused and set my camera, hit the trigger... then ran to sit in place for the 5-shots it would take.  (I set for a higher number of shots to allow the time it would take for me to settle into posing.)

Overall, I am happy with my final product.
Yes, the focus looks to be on my shirt rather than my eyes.  Obviously my head ended up being a bit higher up than my pillow had been.  The pillow was such a good model I didn't even take into account that it was shorter than I am.

Still, I feel it was a good start to my month long challenge.  And I already learned some new things!  Win win!